Sexual Positions & Techniques

Side by Side: A Romantic and Loving Position

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Side by side sex positions: the best positions for romantic lovemaking.

(The photos expand when you click on them.)

But they are not the easiest to get into, unless you use the right technique....so start from the more common missionary position and then roll onto your sides, having agreed which way you'll roll before you go!

The woman needs to hitch her leg up as you can see in the first picture above.

That photo shows our models in a very intimate sexual position which lets the man and woman gaze into each other's eyes, embrace and kiss, or enjoy the sensations of intimacy and closeness.

Since they are facing each other, the man can kiss or caress the woman's breasts and both partners are able to touch each other's chest, body and face.

This can be a very enjoyable adjunct to lovemaking. Certainly, side by side sexual positions give a couple a true sense of intimacy. And there are some very tangible advantages too: a man who usually experiences premature ejaculation. He find this is a great way to last longer in bed, and this may allow him to offer his partner a great deal more pleasure. In fact, he may even be able to bring her to orgasm in this position before he ejaculates. This is partly because his movement is restricted, and partly because his penis does not receive the same pressure from the wall of his partner's vagina.

Even so, he can get deep penetration, and he is unlikely to "fall out" of his partner because of the close linking and connection of their bodies.

This means side by side is also a good sex position for a man with a small penis.

With gentle thrusting, and regular rests, combined with some clitoral play, it's quite possible for even the most premature ejaculator to achieve a long session of intercourse with the woman and man reaching orgasm simultaneously.

Indeed, if you want to discover how to stop premature ejaculation rapidly, just check out side by side sex positions next time you make love.

The rear entry orientation shown in the second photo is a form of side by side sex often called spooning.

It's intimate and allows a lot of bodily contact, but it also allows a couple to fall asleep comfortably after sex with the man wrapped around his partner.

But apart from those advantages, it can be very arousing for the man, with the obvious similarity to rear entry sex.

As always, the best way to discover if it turns you on is to try it out and see what happens!

There are plenty of variations on the theme of side by side sexual positions.

The third photo shows how you can move into any number of different angles and so produce endless variations which may give you more or less of a thrill, depending on the angle at which the erect penis enters the vagina.

As I mentioned before, side by side sex puts less pressure on the penis and slows down your approach to orgasm - which is very useful for men with premature ejaculation.

Flanquette & Cuissade

Positions in which entry is made from a half-rear and half-sideways angle are described by the French as cuissade.

For instance, if a woman is lying on her back and the man is turned sideways to her, and she then bends the leg nearest to him and hooks it over his thigh to enable him to enter her, this is a cuissade position.

Another is when the woman turns her back to the man and draws up one of her legs and he enters her with her other leg between his.

Or she may be half-turned from him. In the cuissade sexual positions the man can enter the woman from a variety of angles, and penetration can be deep.

It is particularly deep if the man, after entering the woman, leans back so that his body is at right angles to hers.

The so-called flanquette positions are those in which entry is made from a half-sideways and half-facing position.

As in the cuissade positions, one of the man's legs is between the woman's legs and one of hers is raised.

The advantages of the flanquette sexual positions are the freedom to vary the angle of entry and also the ability to obtain deep penetration.

The man is able to make slow and deep thrusting movements and the genital contact can be complemented with mouth and breast kisses.

A woman's opinion of side by side sexual positions

(and some hints to women trying it for the first time)

One of my favorite things to do during intercourse is going through one sexual position after another.

Don't misunderstand me: I like man-on-top sex because I can so clearly feel his body on top of me, and I get that special frisson that comes from feeling dominated by a man who loves me and can safely "take" me.

What's more, man on top sex positions are great for the first joining of our bodies during lovemaking, because we kiss and gaze at each other, and my hands are free to caress his ass and balls, and feel his cock as it slides in and out of me.

I can make sex feel very different in this position just by moving my legs slightly: some favorite variations include gripping my man tightly around his waist (which really excites him!), putting my legs straight out, or bending them at the knees (which gives deeper penetration), or adding pressure to his penis and balls by moving my legs closer together.

However, I do like to change position during sex.

After a while we roll on our sides - either way - and then things begin to hot up! It's more even, in the sense that I can caress him and he can caress me, and I can reach to find his balls and the base of his cock more easily.

Side by side sex positions are often suggested as a great way to make love for couples and pregnant women, but sex in this position is worth a try for absolutely anyone!

And it's really simple after you learn how to do it: the key is having the woman raise her legs, with her knees bent, until her thighs are at the height of her man's waist - but you must do this before you turn onto your sides!

Now have the man enter you deeply and keep his penis deep inside you.

Hold your partner firmly - decide which way you're going to turn - and over you go!

The woman's thigh underneath the man's body should be quite comfortable if you've done this correctly. If it's feeling squashed, lift it higher until it feels OK.

You'll be surprised how much variation there can be in side by side sex.

If you lean back, apart from each other, and especially if you lift your upper leg up in the air, you get a great view of your man's erect cock pushing into your pussy.

And this might just excite your man so much he comes quickly! Another benefit: you and your partner can take turns to reach down and feel your clitoris.

You'll find the side by side sexual position allows for a sense of deep, almost spiritual connection during excellent sex.

 Being able to take a pause to look lovingly into each others' eyes, talk to each other, and touch each other lovingly makes a big difference, and you can even send each other beautiful energy between your heart chakras or base (sex) chakras.

Finally, I think it's a great position for pre-sleep lovemaking when neither of you feels very energetic. Even very small thrusts by your man can be deliciously arousing. No wonder this sexual position is one of our favorites!

A man's tips for good sex in the side by side position

It was only after several years' great sex (mostly of the man on top variety) that we discovered side by side sex positions.

We had great sex - why explore anything else?

But you know how it is - boredom creeps in eventually, and so we decided to experiment; from the missionary position we rolled over and had a truly wonderful experience of lovemaking.

This isn't to say that I think the side by side sex position is better than the man on top sex position; it's not, it's just different. And it proved to me that experimenting with sex in as many ways as possible keeps the relationship fresh.

There's an intimacy you may not feel in other sex positions - with lots of skin contact, eye-gazing, seeing her react as she feels you push into her, and the always-amazing warmth and wetness as you thrust deeply!

Better still, my partner can thrust if she wants to do so, more easily than in some other sexual positions.

Since she's in a fairly relaxed position in side by side sex she can play with her man's body - even his nipples, which some men find highly arousing - and she can really feel my penis in her pussy as I thrust, even though it doesn't make me come so quickly.

I actually think that's because my penis moves into her vagina more loosely and this allows me to go on for longer with harder thrusting than in the man on top position.

In addition, talking to each other seems to help us feel more intimate as we make love and give each other feedback on what we're doing....and feeling!

This can be very bonding, and always makes us feel very loving.

Finally, if she wraps her legs around my buttocks and pulls me in towards her, especially if she thrusts her hips during lovemaking, the result can be a pretty powerful orgasm for both of us!

More About Side by Side Sex Positions

For men: In all the surveys of the most popular sex positions, side by side sex comes way down the list. Maybe this is because it's actually quite difficult to get your penis into a woman's vagina when you're lying side by side!

For one thing, it's a lot easier if you actually have a large penis: if you have, you can maneuver into the correct position without too much difficulty. If you're on the less well-endowed side, then arranging yourselves so that penetration is smooth and elegant is more challenging!

The way to approach side by side sex is to first decide if you are going for a frontal or a rear approach - either is possible, and both have their advantages and disadvantages.

Penetration from the rear in this sexual position gives you the ability to fondle her breasts and clitoris during sex, as well as have the pleasure of her buttocks nestle into your testicles as you make love - a very satisfying experience.

It also allows you to see the enjoyable sight of your penis entering your partner's body - which can be extremely exciting and arousing (though it might make you come too quickly!)

Having said that, if you can achieve penetration and find a comfortable position, this is potentially a very satisfying sexual position.

It's important to note that even though websites like this one offer all kinds of advice and suggestions about how you might enjoy sex more, what actually counts more in the end is the enjoyment and pleasure you get from sex, regardless of the position!

(And please do read the text below, because the frontal side by side position is very good for men who tend to come quickly - it prolongs intercourse, because there's less pressure on your penis in this position, yet the orgasm you'll eventually enjoy is just as satisfying it is in the man on top position.)

For women: Although it is not illustrated above, the frontal side by side position - where you can look at each other, lying on your sides chest to chest, facing each other - can be more enjoyable than the slightly less intimate position shown above: unless, of course, you are looking for a good, hard bout of boisterous sex, in which case the position shown in the photographs above may be more to your taste!

The frontal side by side sex position, is a position in which to enjoy slow, romantic and loving sexual intercourse. To get into this position, the easiest way is to start from the man on top missionary position.

Decide which way you are going to roll over onto your sides, and then move the leg which will be underneath your man and you when you have rolled over upwards so that your combined weight when you roll over to that side will be positioned on your thigh.

Then, simply roll over without withdrawing his penis from your vagina, and you have a perfectly relaxing position for sex: you can look each other in the eyes, caress closely or separate your upper bodies so that he can admire your breasts (and give them the attention they deserve!).

To add to the romance of this position, you can kiss and caress each other, stroking each other's buttocks, back and chests as you wish, with the added advantage that you can each reach down and play with his penis and balls as well as your vulva and clitoris, as he thrusts into and out of your vagina.

The feel of his penis sliding in and out of your vagina, wet with your juices, pushing into you as deeply as he can go, is a tremendously exciting one!

All in all, this sexual position is an exciting and satisfying one, and it deserves to feature more highly on people's lists of favorites than it does. It has other advantages too - it assists in delaying ejaculation, producing less pressure on the man's penis than some other ways of making love.

Side by side sexual positions developed

The side by side sex position, lying facing each other on your sides, can be the least tiring of all the sexual positions.

If you want to start making love in the side by side position, rather than move into it by rolling over from the man on top, start with the man lying on his right side facing his partner, who lies turned towards him on her left side.

She then raises her lower leg, the one on the bed, and passes it over his lower leg, bending it a little at the knee and pushing her thigh high up between the man's. He then passes his upper leg over her lower leg at the same time maneuvering his penis into line with her vagina entrance.

The woman will nearly always have to help his penis into her vagina; as soon as the man feels the warm softness of her vagina around his penis, he thrusts his upper leg as far over as it will go, which pushes his penis deeper into her.

She then passes her upper leg over his upper leg, bending it so that, if possible, she can take a purchase with the crook of her knee on the man's hipbone.

If all this makes this sex position sound difficult if not impossible to get into, then simply start in the man on top or missionary position, and roll over onto your sides: in practice the right side is generally preferred for the woman, which, of course, implies the left side for the man.

This position requires that the woman draws up the leg on which she is lying. The leg which lies uppermost can either be stretched or flexed at will. Increase or decrease of the feminine (or masculine) pelvic angles allows you to find many variations here.

The principal advantages of this sexual posture are convenience and ease, relaxation, comfort, and a much slower progress to orgasm for the man (although because friction tends to be reduced on his erection, he may also feel less pleasure when he comes), and avoidance of the pressure of his weight on her body.

The drawbacks arise from the localized pressure on the woman's legs - and even this can be avoided by approaching the normal horizontal position or through extreme flexion and lifting of the captive limb. To some degree, also, the man is immobilized and has less freedom to operate in this position.

You may find that you end up with the man lying more on his back than on his side, and his penis may not be very far into his partner.

If the tip of the penis can get even a short way past the vaginal entrance, so that the head and none of the shaft penetrates the vagina and can be withdrawn and then put back again, sensations are produced in the woman which are quite unlike any other; the man, too, enjoys the feeling of his glans rubbing against the soft tissues of the vaginal entrance.

But because there is much less pressure on his penis in this position, he is much more likely to be able to stop premature ejaculation by using cognitive behavioral treatments such as the ones described here - click here to learn more and discover how easy it is to last longer in bed.

The mutual sensations experienced in this position are like no other, except perhaps in the man on top position for intercourse when the man arches his back and holds his pubic area away from his partner's so that only the head of his penis goes in and out of her vaginal entrance.

This movement, however, is tiring, whereas the thrust and withdrawal in the side-by-side position produces no physical strain. But one big drawback is that there can be so much lubricating fluid produced in this sexual position that the penis loses friction with the vagina at the very moment the man is reaching the point of orgasm and ejaculation, with reduced sensation for one or both partners as a result.